RollnUp Smoke Shop & Liquor

Get Tipsy

Thu
1
Aug

Go Outside and Play, Dammit!

My best friend Bria and I began a Tuesday evening ritual. We have a standing tee time at our local golf course. We arrive around 5:30pm, load up a twelve pack of Miller 64, and play 18 holes. Now Bria and I are not terrible, but we are definitely not going to join the pro circuit anytime soon. It gives us a chance to gossip and drink while still being somewhat active. Yes, I take a cart, and I know walking is healthier, but I am no marathon runner, and if I am walking where the hell am I going to put the beer cooler? We golf because we love the game, but it also gives you a sense of accomplishment when you finish a round. I love catching up with friends over beers at the local tavern, but if given a choice of backdrops I would pick a golf course every time. I recall my Dad storming in when I was a child, kicking me and my friends out of the house yelling, “It’s nice outside, go and play dammit!” I repeat that mantra when it is seventy-five degrees and sunny outside, but the Lifetime network is airing a 24-hour project Runway marathon. It is August folks; let’s stuff as much fun outdoor activities in before the weather goes to shit.

My favorite memories from college were by a pond catching crappie with my friends, listening to Dave Matthews Band from an old boom box and drinking cheap beer. We were too broke to go to the bars every night so we got into a habit of hanging out around a small pond next to our apartment complex. One afternoon, our dreamy outdoorsy neighbor dude handed out fishing poles and bait. That day we were no longer college students getting drunk out by the pond, we were sportsmen! I can’t say that I am proficient in angling, but I can bait a hook, cast, and watch a bobber while enjoying an ice cold beverage. Here is a tip for you guys and gals on the prowl: dreamy outdoorsy neighbor dude got a ton of play by taking his dates fishing. The single female population of this apartment complex may or may not have spied on him…some may call it stalking. While we were in the bushes pointing out how awful his choices in women were, we swooned over the bottle of wine he chilled, the lanterns that he placed on the dock, and how he would cheer when his “so wrong for him” date caught a fish. Neighbor dude figured out that taking a girl fishing was much more authentic then dinner at some random chain restaurant, and a hell of a lot cheaper. Head over to your local sporting goods store and buy a cheap pole and a fishing license. Swing by the RollnUp to grab your favorite drink and bait. Why yes, we do carry live bait – thanks for asking!

If you are the super cool outgoing type, you probably have a gaggle of friends. Finding an activity to please everyone is challenging, but I have a game that will please your healthy exercise freak friend and your lazy chain smoking friend alike. A Whiffle ball and bat will set you back about five bucks, but the small investment will bring you hours of amusement. A large outdoor space isn’t needed; the game was designed for backyards and city streets. Athleticism isn’t a requirement for Wiffle ball either; after my coworker hit a line drive over his backyard fence, he rounded the bases with a Marlboro dangling out of his mouth, being careful to not spill his beer. It is a simple children’s game that can take an overworked, stressed-out group of adults and turn them into laughing cheering kids. For your official Wiffle rules check out www.wiffle.com.

Corn-Hole, bags, washers, and horseshoes are quintessential “let’s drink heavily but do something where we keep score” outdoor activities. You don’t need the use of both hands when tossing a bean bag; one can stay free to hold a cocktail. A good underhand throw and the ability to count to twenty-one will give you the credentials to become champion at any of these backyard competitions. I recently ordered Corn-Hole boards from the website www.victorytailgate.com, most of my handier friends built their own. Over the fourth of July weekend it seemed like there was a constant game of bags being played, along with a constant stream of shit talking between friendly rivals. I think these games can be essential for surviving a family get-together as well. When you are focused on a game outside in the fresh air it gives you less time to talk about uncomfortable family drama. There will be plenty of opportunities when you are cooped up with your family at Thanksgiving and Christmas to engage in a screaming match with your siblings.

We forget to go out and play when we are adults. The people in my life that I observe as the happiest are my friends who have not forgotten how to play. They are involved in softball leagues, play intramural soccer, and take ski trips in the winter. They take time out for themselves by participating in a hobby that they enjoy. Looking back, I was pretty lousy at every organized sport I participated in, but I was a kid and I had a blast. I grew older and more self-conscience. I missed out on so many experiences because I was afraid of failing or looking silly. I have grown out of that phase; I don’t give a shit anymore. I may shank the ball twenty times in a row, but if my best friend is in the cart and the cooler is full of beer, I will smile and let you play through.

 

By Holly Kruep

 

 

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